WASHINGTON, DC - MAY 9, 2014: Demonstrators hold signs in front of the White House May 9, 2014 in Washington D.C. Demonstrators marched from the National Mall to the White House to protest the Congressional appropriations legislation that provides funds to the Department of Homeland Security to maintain 34,000 detainees for deportation. Five of the protesters were arrested in front of the White House for failing to vacate the area when warned by security. (Photo by Allison Shelley/Getty Images)

Sometimes I question the intelligence of our lawmakers based on some of the laws we pass. Bozeman just recently passed an ordinance for us to all get along with each other. I guess there is no way we could possibly respect each other without getting the law enforcement community involved. But Montana and other states don’t have the market cornered on weird laws. Here are some others you might wonder about.

Fun Facts About Our Weird Laws

  • If you are headed to Milwaukee, Wisconsin for your vacation be advised that parking your car for more that two hours is prohibited unless it’s hitched to a horse. Nothing weird about that.
  • While we are on the subject of horses – Make sure your horse is attractive if you are headed to Wilbur, Washington. It’s illegal to ride an ugly horse there.
  • Why did the chicken cross the road? Not in Quitman, Georgia where chickens are not allowed to cross the road. I guess residents there will never know.
  • Thinking about marrying your first cousin? No not in Kentucky, Tennessee, or Arkansas where you might think it would be legal. You can marry your first cousin in Utah as long as they are 65 or older. At least they’d be eligible for Medicare.
  • “Five Finger Discount Day” is July 4th in North Dakota where no one can be arrested on that day. I think I’ll go car shopping.
  • If you are bald in Michigan it’s OK. Under Michigan law the husband is the legal owner of his wife’s hair.
  • Michigan also will not allow you to tie your alligator to a fire hydrant. Where am I supposed to tie it?
  • Kalispell, Montana residents might not be aware that kids must have a doctor’s permission to buy a lollipop. Lollipop Card?
  • Deodorant sales might be up in Lander, Wyoming where it’s illegal to take more than one bath a month during cold weather. Kids get no baths during the winter.
  • Colorado still has a law on the books requiring a doctor’s prescription before a resident can take a bath.
  • It’s also illegal to marry your wife’s grandmother in Colorado.
  • Double-parking in Minneapolis will get you bread and water on a chain gang. Take a cab.
  • Atheists are forbidden to hold or run for office in Tennessee.
  • Children in Tennessee can’t legally play games on Sunday without a license.
  • You can kill two birds with one stone in Florida. Under Florida law, anyone taking a bath must be fully clothed. Tide bath beads?
  • You might be a big winner in Eureka, Nevada but it’s illegal to kiss any woman there if you have a mustache. I could find nothing about the woman having a mustache.
  • Men get a day off in Hartford, Connecticut because it’s illegal to kiss your wife on Sunday there. I guess a hug will have to do.

Some Final Thoughts

I’m sure there has to be some really good reasons for laws like these. I guess you had to be there. Another fun law comes from Kansas. When two trains meet at a crossing, “both shall come to a full stop and neither shall start up again until the other has gone.” Sounds simple right? As long as there are politicians there will always be comedy.