One of the most overused words in the English language today has to be the word easy. Because it almost never is.

My Funk & Wagnall define easy as: achieved without great effort; presenting few difficulties.

“New Easy Open Package” — yeah —right. Most of the easy open package ends up in the trash thanks to, first a knife, and then scissors, to get the product out of the easy open package.

Easy close goes right out the window too since there’s nothing to close after the total annihilation of the original package just to get into it.

Then you have to come up with a Ziplock bag to replace the easy close promise.

Where are those truth in advertising nuts when we need em?

Some Assembly Required?

Any adult that’s tried to assemble their child’s toy on Christmas Eve know the fallacy of that statement. Some Assembly Required, if you happen to have a doctorate in Mechanical Engineering.

Otherwise your frustration just escalates as the sun begins to rise and your little one is definitely not sleeping in.

On the off chance that you do get it assembled you can confirm that the accompanying instructions are a total waste of a good tree.


This is my real pet peeve. You pull out the package with that little inviting tab that says pull here.

You know in your heart disappointment is mere moments away.

You pull and everything starts out fine instilling you with a false sense of security for the first time in your life that you’re going to pull it all the way across and life will be wonderful.

And halfway or less the perfs become stronger than that black adhesive they advertise on TV and your tab tears off. What’s next? Knife and Scissors and a Ziplock bag.

Some Final Thoughts

How boring would life be if everything were easy? Perforations always worked, easy open easy close was never in question. We’d be tearing things open just for variety.

How nice if some assembly required actually lived up to it’s name.

But these little imperfections are just a way for us to appreciate things a little more on those rare occasions when easy open really works.

How easy are things for you these days?

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