‘Time For a Rhyme?’ – ‘Love Gone Wrong’ Bad Date Story Grand Prize
We received many submissions for our Love Gone Wrong contest and we had to narrow it down to one for the grand prize. While the decision was a difficult one, this story is both wacky and entertaining. It was not an easy pick the ‘best’ story considering all of the terrible date experiences submitted by our readers, but we hope you get a chuckle out of this story just as we did.
For being chosen as the best submission, our unlucky suitor has won great prizes from Erotique, Re-Couture, Cateye Cafe and Smokin’ Smitty’s.
I should have been suspect when I got a note the new guy in my office, asking me out to dinner…written in multiple colors of crayon!
We went to a cozy restaurant and were getting acquainted with general conversation while sipping our drinks. The waiter elegantly served our food and as I was savoring the first bite of my tender filet, Steve leaned forward and looking intensely into my eyes asked, “What are you thinking? What are you feeling?”
Completely taken off guard and feeling his questions were totally inappropriate I responded, “I’m thinking this is great food and I’m feeling hungry!”
I soon realized how over-the-top intense this guy was when two more times through the course of our dinner he repeated his probing questions of, “What are you thinking? What are you feeling?” Upon the third inquiry, I stated, “I’m thinking it’s late and I’m feeling tired. I’d like to go home.”
He quickly reached down to his satchel to retrieve something and replied, “Well, before we leave I wanted to read something to you,” and placing a book on the table explained, “Dr. Seuss is one of my favorite authors!”
Horrified, I glanced around the crowded restaurant hoping no one was eavesdropping on our “intimate” conversation and confessed, “You know, I gave up Dr. Seuss a long time ago. I’m really not interested. I think we should go.”
Dejectedly he agreed, paid the bill and we headed toward the car…all the while I was thinking, “What kind of nut case is this guy?! I hope I get home OK!!”
The route to my apartment passed nearby his condo and as we were nearing his place, he made an attempt to extend our evening together by saying, “I was unpacking some of my things and came across something I’ve done with other gals in the past and I was wondering if you’d like to stop at my place and do some coloring?”
WHAT???!!! I was beyond shocked, getting a bit scared at this point, and calmly replied, “I gave up coloring a long time ago; I would just like to go home.”
Despondently he proceeded to my apartment and all the while I was thinking, “I CANNOT WAIT to get out of this guy’s presence! I WILL NEVER GO OUT WITH HIM AGAIN!”
He pulled up in front of my apartment and as I had one foot out of the car ready to sprint to my door, he had the nerve to ask me, “If I asked you out again, would you go out with me?” My response? “You know, I don’t think so. I’m thinking it’s late and I’m feeling tired. Goodnight.”
Feeling I had escaped with my life I couldn’t get into my apartment and lock the door fast enough! A bit wiser from that “date”, I vowed in the future that I would steer clear of all guys who communicated in crayon.
We feel bad for the Dr. Seuss Suitor in this story as well. Maybe one day he will find that special ‘who’ and be loved crayons and all.
“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.”