OK, I’m convinced. We have to do something about the greatest threat to our civilization. Climate change became the top threat when it replaced Hostess going out of business and not making Twinkies any longer.

I realize this climate change thing is going to be a monumental task, but I am up for it. Someone just tell me what to do.

What’s The Plan?

As I understand it climate is not changing everywhere. It seems to be just now and then and here and there. China has a lot of problems, Hawaii not so much.

So we have to come up with a plan of what needs cooling and what needs warming.

It seems that the poles are always in question. One year there is more ice another year there is less.

However since no one lives there I think they should be regulated to last place. The Polar Bears can live on rafts until we can get around to them.

Who Goes First?

I think we should either warm or cool our allies first. Germany, Japan, Israel, should go to the top of the list. We need to sit down with them and see which ones need to be cooler and which ones need to be warmer and act accordingly.

Next I would make it either colder or hotter for our enemies. Russia, China and ISIS should be much colder in winter and much hotter in summer. Except for Siberia – we can keep that freezing cold year round.

Ski areas should be cooled a little more for increased snow packs. While places like Miami and Mexico might be a little warmer for the tourist trade.

That Amazon rain forest could be an issue too. We should make sure they have plenty of rain. We can move some rain there from Seattle.

What about Death Valley? Would more tourists go there if it were cooler or could you no longer call it Death Valley? Or Phoenix, Arizona. Cool that place too much and illegal immigration might get out of hand.

These are just a few of the serious questions we have to consider before we can implement a successful climate change plan.

Some Final Thoughts

Obviously this is a tongue in cheek blog. But it does make you think. If man can change the climate for the worse what makes you think that changing our behaviors will make things any better?

If the climate is warming will our efforts cool it too much? Is it possible to over compensate in the opposite direction? Then what do we do? Add CO2 to all arousal products?

Will polar bears and penguins start freezing to death? Will people burst into flame at the equator?

We always seem to have good intentions but those intentions often seem to have adverse unintended consequences we did not foresee.

It’s a big world out there and it’s been around a few billion years longer than we have. I think the planet can handle whatever we puny humans can throw at it.

It’s not nice to fool Mother Nature.

Comments below.