It’s Too Hot, I Almost Killed My GPS

Air conditioning.

After leaving the radio station Friday I was sitting in my car and noticed my GPS was off. Odd because I keep it on all the time. Part of being a talk show host and working in cities like Las Vegas, Denver, Sacramento, Birmingham, New York City, Beaumont. I seem to get lost easily. So I use the GPS for everything. Even when I know how to get somewhere, I use the GPS because I like hearing its voice.

On my GPS, you can have a male voice, a female voice, American, English, Spanish, Arabic, German... I use American female. She is like my friend. Do I sound like a lonely old guy who only has a GPS as a friend?

She tells me, "You've arrived at KMMS Radio."

I am also always thinking and listening to AM1450 to make sure everything is working correctly. Yep, part of my job is to listen to the station. I love the fact that I get paid to listen to radio and I would do it for free.

So as I drive, I can be thinking about life or work and the GPS reminds me, "Make a left here."

I got in my car after work and the GPS was off. It is always on. What's happening? I turn it back on and the screen it says:

The temperature in the car was so high, the GPS turned itself off in order to prevent damage to itself.

"No, Montana is cool all the time, you don't need an air conditioner." That's what they told me before I moved here. It was so hot my GPS turned itself off to save its life.

That does it, I am buying an air conditioner right now. So I left the station, drove to the store  used my last bit of money till payday and I HAVE AIR CONDITIONING in my place.

Simple. But not really, The box was so heavy I needed help getting it in the shopping carriage. The lady at Walmart said, "You need some help, honey?"

Yeah, can you call a guy to help me get this in my carriage and out to my car? She looked at me, smiled and picked up the 80-pound air conditioner and not only put it in my carriage but also loaded it into my car.

Shrinkage. ( A Seinfeld reverence)

Got it home and had to go on Craigslist to hire a guy to carry it up to my apartment. $40. Once inside my hot apartment, I tried for two hours to set up the air conditioner in the window. I did something a lot of men in my family never do. I read the institutions. Still couldn't get it working. The answer: Craigslist.

Cody, a young guy, said he would try to get the air conditioner working arrived at my apartment. The cost: another $40.

When Cody arrives I give him the instructions, play him a video on YouTube, which shows you how to install these brand of air conditioners. He looks at everything and walks to my bedroom and starts to put the machine together.

Now, people accuse me sometimes of being a shock jock type talk show host. I am not; it is just that shocking things happen to me all the time.

Cody is working and smiles then tells me, "I had sex in this room.:

WHAT!

Your address sounded familiar and this was my girlfriend's old apartment. We are in her bedroom.

I smiled and said, "Oh, that's cool you had...I mean you were with your girlfriend..."

Her name was Hannah. He interrupted.

Hannah in this room. "Well, thanks for telling me. I'll have it cleaned," I said and smiled.

See, shocking things just happen to me.

After an hour of work, Cody left, promising to listen to my radio show Dominick in the Morning. I turn on the unit...it worked.

Thank you, God. I have air conditioning I set it to 65 degrees and went to bed.

I have AIR CONDITIONING.